The Myth of The Metrosexual

I have heard too much about this stupid concept to not touch on it briefly.

I first heard about the concept of the "Metrosexual" from a friend of mine like last year, so I was a little late to the slang party. When she explained to me what a metrosexual was I was instantly appalled that a word had been made up to describe a man who did not some classic picture of what a man should be and cared a little bit about the way he looked in public. What was going on in this society where new groups of people were being randomly named and created based on a few factors of their lives. I thought the entire idea was stupid and I just shrugged it off at the time.

About a day or two later I watched this episode of South Park (one of the funniest I have seen to date). In it they mock the idea of metrosexuals (like the way they treat most topics in South Park Land) and envision the metrosexual movement taking over the humble town. Apparently Matt and Trey thought the way I did, or at least they saw the idea as being one that was easily mockable. Check out the episode if you can find it somewhere, it is truly funny.

Today at lunch, while my roommate, my buddy, and I were talking about the goings on of the past weekend, my roommate mentioned that he met a girl who said that she was "looking to date a metrosexual". Damnit, there's that word again! What the F! What does this mean?! What was she describing when she said Metrosexual? What does she really have in mind? The term I believe is inherently ambiguous and should be abolished from our language. Does she mean she wants some guy who is going to shower and perhaps manicure his toenails? A guy who puts fine china on the walls as decorative pieces? Someone who is into candles and bubble baths? What does it mean? I don't think that she really knows, nor do I think people who use the word really know what they are describing. In their heads I am sure metrosexual could equal many things. a guy who acts gay, but isn't. A guy who is sensitive and likes things that guys commonly don't like. But those two explanations have flaws in them themselves. What does "act gay" mean, and if a lot of guys are starting to like the things that guys usually don't like, doesn't that mean that guys now like these things, who are we differentiating from here?

In general this discussion leaves me confused. I should add that when I brought up the term with my sister her words were "You're kinda metrosexual aren't you" at which point I almost lost it. Now I will be the first person to tell you I'm into a lot of stuff. But to be placed in some made up category because I like to smell good and light a candle here and there is preposterous in my eyes. If a guy has feminine qualities, he is effeminate. He may still be straight or gay, but he is effeminate nonetheless. And by qualities I don't mean that he likes things guys are not commonly into, I mean mannerisms, way of using language and speaking, even some forms of dress. The word effeminate has been around for a while now and has established itself in our lexicon, let's not add another word to describe a varied set of characteristics that change per person and have no real basis to begin with.

One last link here to a Levi's Ad. It does not really support or deny any of my arguments, but it is freakin hilarious and does depict how I believe a lot of guys might feel these days.